If Joan Rivers was here, she’d smack the crap out of you

We live in a society where everyone’s a winner.  Kids get a trophy for just for participating on a sports team even if they never showed up for practice, never scored a point, or never learned the most basic skills of the game.  Instead of being honest and saying, “Johnny, here’s a trophy to signify that you barely contributed,” we pat the kids on the back and praise them even if whatever they did was an epic fail.  This mentality is all around and has even found its way to the hosts of E!’s Fashion Police ever since Joan Rivers passed away.  Kathy Griffin and Kelly Osbourne have left the show due to “creative” differences and people from all over are praising them for this.  

If you haven’t seen Fashion Police, I would take a guess and say that you fall into one or more of the following categories: over 50 years old, male, or don’t have cable tv.  In that event, let me break down how the show runs.  Basically you have four B list celebrities, most of whom have very little professional fashion training, critiquing celebrities for their fashion choices.  The hosts do not hold back on their praise or their scorn for the outfits of choice.  This is the magic of the show - taking over paid, over ego-ed, over indulged celebrities and knocking them down a few notches.  

After only 7 episodes, Kathy Griffin decided to leave the show saying her improv style of comedy didn't mesh well with the formula of the show.  She was quoted as saying,

“I do not want to use my comedy to contribute to a culture of unattainable perfectionism and intolerance towards difference.” 

Adding that she, “wants to help women, gay kids, people of color and anyone who feels underrepresented to have a voice and laugh.” 

Really?  In your 1998 show “Hot Cup of Talk” you said, “There's something about Shania Twain I just don't trust. I don't know, I can't put my finger...she's just too thin. I like my country singers to have the big hair and the big ass.”   Or what about the time she said this about Ryan Seacrest, "The thing that's really weird about Seacrest is that he's super into grooming. He gets mani-pedi's. He gets his eyelashes dyed. He goes to Mystic Tan, he flat-irons his hair. Very butch. Very typical of straight men!”  

She rants and raves in a ridiculous manifesto on Instagram about tolerance when she is notoriously known for making crass remarks about the physical appearances of celebrities.

Then there is Kelly Osbourne , who let’s face it would be a nobody if it wasn't for Fashion Police.  She's a former reality show star with no formal fashion training yet she gets to work as a host of Fashion Police.  She decided to leave after Giuliana Rancic made an inappropriate comment about her friend Zendaya.    

Seriously that’s hilarious.  Um, Kelly, you sat there and laughed when Joan Rivers said this about actress Marion Cotillard’s dress, “The pattern looks like Precious sat on someone’s butterfly collection.”  Where were all of your moral standards then?

However, what I think is the most annoying thing about Kathy and Kelly’s exodus is the influx of celebrities coming out of the woodwork to show their support for Kathy and Kelly for “taking a stand”.  Lena Dunham posted a shout-out to Kathy when she said,” "Congrats to my beautiful friend Kathy Griffin for bravely saying enough is enough to intolerance of all kinds on television.  She's modeling a better way for the youths (and working those ears.).”  For real?  Kathy is one of the most crude female comedians out there and now you’re praising her for setting a good example for youths. 

And can someone please be honest with Kelly Osborne for me?  Instead of patting her on the back and giving her a participant trophy for her role on Fashion Police, let’s say what we are all thinking. 

Kelly, dear, you are making a huge mistake by walking away.  You will have no career if you leave this show.  While you may think this is the best way to go, taking a stand unfortunately does not pay the bills.  Go back to E! with your tail between your legs and your purple hair dyed back to a normal color because if we are being totally honest, your hair is a hot mess, and not in a good way.

What Kathy and Kelly need to understand is we don’t watch Fashion Police for it's moral compass.  We watch it because we love when Hollywood is pulled back down to reality.  We love it when someone on tv says what we are all thinking.  We love it when celebrities are reminded that just because they can sing or act (or in the Kardashian’s case simply exist), it doesn't mean they are immune to the realities of life.  

So Kathy and Kelly if you are reading this blog post consider it to be my way of metaphorically taking Joan River’s hand and smacking the crap out of you for being so high and mighty.

Who knew that Joan Rivers was the glue, or in her case the botox, that was holding Fashion Police together?

Kathy Griffin and Kelly Osbourne - riding their high horses off the show and into the sunset