The Cloak of Hollywood Parental Embarrassment

No matter how hard you try as a parent, there will be times when you are an embarrassment to your kids.  Something will happen when you say the wrong thing, wear the wrong outfit, or make a mistake that will cause humiliation to your child.  It’s normal.  It’s part of life.  It’s almost a rite of passage.  As a parent, I have realized that as cool as I think I am now, there will come a day when my teenager will let me know otherwise.  You can’t fault them for their honesty.  They are only doing what comes naturally to them.  The hope is that one day, your child will start seeing you less like a social outcast and more like a parent who loved them so much you tried anything to win their approval.  But for some unfortunate sons and daughters this day has yet to come.

Recently Alan Thicke, Robin Thicke’s father, told Us Weekly that he listens to his son’s music when getting it on with his wife.  Yes, you heard me correctly.  He stated that “When we do get freaky, we love Robin’s song ‘Sex Thearpy’.”  He added, “You have to admit, it’s a great song to get in the mood.”  I have but three responses to Alan Thicke.  Eew.  Ick.  And why?

We can all agree that when it comes to our parents they only had sex the number of times they created a child.  We don’t want to think of our parents as sexual beings.  We don’t want to believe that they have feelings and desires.  They are our parents, and as far as we are concerned they are sexless.  I'm sure Robin Thicke feels the same way.  I'm sure hearing that his dad is, as Alan put it, "getting freaky" to one of his songs was probably very embarrassing for him.  Honestly, I felt a bit sorry for the guy, yet at the same time I felt comforted because it because it made me realize something.  Celebrities likes to think of themselves as a superior class.  They have the money, good looks, and fame.  But at the end of the day they are just as embarrassing to their kids as we are to ours.  

Some of these poor Hollywood children just can't get away from the lifetime of parental embarrassment.  I often think of Madonna’s daughter Lourdes and wonder how she makes it through the day without constantly being clothed in a cloak of embarrassment when it comes to her mother.  One day Madonna's prancing around in a matador outfit.  The next day she’s talking about why you shouldn’t make out with Drake.  Then she has rats running through her bathroom during a live internet chat.   The embarrassment just keep on coming for Lourdes.

And let’s not forget some of the most embarrassing future Hollywood parents – Justin Bieber, Lady Gaga, and Lindsay Lohan just to name a few.  One quick google search by their kids and they will have unleashed a hellmouth of embarrassment unbeknownst to any of us. 

Tom Cruise, John Travolta, any “Real Housewife” mom – they are the same to their kids as we are to ours - out of date, uncool and embarrassing.  Despite our best efforts as parents, we will embarrass our kids at some point in time.  But you know what, maybe that’s ok.  Maybe that’s the way parents are supposed to be.  We shouldn't be their peer.  We should be their parent.  We should say the wrong things, wear the wrong clothes, and make mistakes that humiliate our children.  It's part of our job as a mom and a dad.

If we do any of the above we can consider our job as parents a job done well.  Our kids will survive and they will grow up knowing that one day soon their parents will stop embarrassing them.  That is unless you are Robin Thicke or Lourdes.  Those poor kids just can’t catch a break.

Oh Alan.  Have you any idea the embarrassment you caused your son?  He's almost as embarrassed as he was after watching his own performance with Miley Cyrus on the 2013 VMA awards.  Almost, but not quite.

I don't think anyone could be more embarrassed by that kiss than Drake.

Cut to Lourdes.

Don't worry Lourdes.  Your mom is 56 years old.  I would give her only about 30 more years left to embarrass you.